Bullying: Complicit Silence in the Face of Indignity

DPI/NGO Chat Series organized by NGO Youth Representatives to DPI, Tuesday, October 10, 2017

An informal gathering of about 50 members of the NGOs met at the DPI/NGO Resource Center, NY, to discuss the growing issue of bullying, whether at home, in the classroom, or at work.

Two very experienced presenters addressed this delicate subject with patience, compassion, understanding, and fun, using the help of many real life scenarios!

Mr. George Anthony, UN Representative, Pathways to Peace, did a short exercise that illustrated how the use of the word, ‘you,’ can be confrontational when dealing with bullying behaviors. This word puts people on the defensive. Rather, he said, to express how you are feel or what you want them to do brings better results. For example, “I want you to let go of my wrist.”

Ms. Javita Nauth, Board Member, Gather for Good, Inc, Cultivating a Culture of Compassion, had members of the audience act out various real life situations that brought out what’s behind bullying. It was fun, yet informative.

Ms. Nauth noted that a bully actually lacks empathy which probably has a link to his/her upbringing. There are many ways to help a ‘bully,’ one of them is never to call him/her a bully. Instead, address them by their name and remind them of who they are. The same needs to be done for the one being bullied. This helps them to recognize their self-worth and value themselves as a human being, and not a victim. The Art of Listening is a much needed skill when helping a ‘bully’ and the bullied.

Both presenters deftly answered the many questions that were asked. They emphasized the role of proper parenting and the empowering of our children to be agents of change. They encouraged parents to observe their children to see the slightest difference in their body language, etc. that may be a result of bullying. Try to engage them in a conversation. However, it is important to note that the moment we begin to feel frustrated, do not start a conversation.

Cyber bullying was also addressed. Everyone was reminded: remember, we always have a choice – no need to respond to emails or texts that we feel are causing harassment to us.

The highlight of the chat is: STAND UP AND LEAD. DON’T JUST STAND THERE AND DO NOTHING. Be a part of the solution rather than a part of the problem. There is no need to support bullying behaviors. Talk to someone. Get help.